Nov 4 • 23M

No mistakes in leaving, local parade calendars as community finding, and choosing yourself in the midst of enmeshment

Yes Yes #14

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marlee grace
A monthly advice column in podcast form

Yes Yes is a monthly advice column / podcast for paid subscribers of the Monday Monday newsletter. You are welcome to leave comments at the bottom and submit your anonymous questions for next month. Enjoy listening above or reading below. You are welcome to share screenshots on social media.

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Hello and welcome to Yes Yes. It's me, Marlee Grace, and this is my monthly advice podcast for you, the paid subscribers of the Monday Monday newsletter. It is November here in northern Michigan. It's sunny. The leaves have fallen from the trees. The apple tree in front of me is hanging on - there's bright red apples that are hanging on the apple tree in the meadow. All of those apples have fallen. And then in the driveway up to my house, there's apple trees that line that, and those have mostly fallen, but the bright red ones are really hanging on. I just took my friend Liz of Sister Spinster's class Apple Magic, and it was so good and just made me think a lot about apples. I have my grandmother, Marlys, who I never met, but was an amazing quilter. Her brother Milan had an apple orchard in Wisconsin that's still in his family. And June has been picking up the apples (my dog) and playing with them. I've been calling her my little apple farmer. So thinking a lot about the apples today.

IN THIS EPISODE :

🪩 FINDING THE RIGHT SPACE FOR SOBRIETY + EMOTIONAL RECOVERY

🎀 WHERE DOES COMMUNITY LIVE : DIGITAL SPACES AND THE LOCAL TOWN HALL

👑 PARADE CALENDARS

🚣🏼‍♂️ NO MISTAKES IN MOVING OUT AND MOVING ON

🫧 CHOOSING YOURSELF TO THAT WE CAN LOVE OTHER PEOPLE BETTER

🥞 KNOWING WHERE WE START AND OTHER PEOPLE STOP

It's so beautiful here right now. And I'm sort of in that strange in between of being so grateful to live so far north and it being November and it being so nice out and sunny and warm, and then wondering how the structure of earth and climate catastrophe is feeling about that. So sitting in between both and hoping that wherever you're tuning in from, you're having a beautiful day.

So as you may or may not know, you can listen to this in Apple Podcasts, private feed of Yes Yes. That will give you alerts when there's new episodes. You can listen in your browser and yeah, that's kind of the deal here on Yes Yes. And at the bottom of the transcription, every episode is transcribed so you can read along or read if that is your preference or accessibility need, but there's a box where you can ask questions for next month. And I appreciate your patience. Of course, if you ask a question, that doesn't necessarily mean I'll answer it ever or in any sort of timeline, but I'm really doing my best to get through them all.

So today we're gonna talk about sobriety and finding community and living alone, and I'm excited to talk about all three. So kick back, get a beverage. Maybe you're driving, keep your hands on 10 and 2 and enjoy this episode of Yes Yes. Okay, let's jump right in.

🌼 QUESTION 1

I am sober today because I have listened to folks like you, and other sober friends in my past. I am deeply grateful. For me, the underneath of it all was death by one million negative thoughts about me which included deep criticism of my 5ish times per week drinking 2-3 drinks and having a cigarette when that happened. So, it was not without chaos in some ways & it seems so freaking normalized (as you well know). Drinking is every fucking where in "our" culture. The stories of how alcohol powerful and cunning made a mess of me are in the cannon and will be extracted. I feel connected to Brene' Brown's story, but I also know we don't need to differentiate. I have heard you reference ALANON many times. I think that is true? I am toggling between both rooms. I think AA will be more of a home for me, I have 12 days so you know, I am super early on this journey. So, what lands you happier in ALANON? Or can you just rift about your recovery journey meeting-wise? Have you tried CODA? Is this question a Gemini thing :) Many blessings.

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